Wednesday 9 October 2019

Rude People – How You Can Deal With Them!


Photo by Timon Studler on Unsplash

It is a fact of life in the 21st Century that everyone is becoming ruder.  But that really should come as no surprise because our parents, our grandparents even our great grandparents would have said the same.

As children we are often taught not to respond to a rude remark (or behaviour) with rudeness but on the other hand, letting the person being rude towards us just feels so 
wrong, and it often goes against everything we know.

Simply try to ignore it (I know that is not so easy) – that person who is watching a video without headphones in the seat beside you really should have some consideration but they don’t so what can you do?

First of all consider this - the person doing this may well have their reasons for behaving in this way.  If you follow this approach, even though you don’t know what those reasons are, it might make their behaviour seem rude.

However there are people who are bad mannered and are simply “rule breakers”.  You know the ones who push ahead of everyone in a queue, they know it is the height of rudeness but they do it anyway.  However, on the other side of that coin, they might have been raised in a country where such behaviour is perfectly acceptable.

Similarly, sniffing instead of blowing one’s nose in public is, in certain countries, considered to be politeness.

If someone were to “ignore” you in the works tearoom would you assume that you were being avoided deliberately?  However, is it just possible that the other person may think that they are respecting you privacy?  One approach you could follow would be to invite them to come over and join you.

It was once observed that we can make ourselves miserable by attempting to control things that we have no control over and failing to control the things that we can.

If we look again at rudeness you may have several choices

a)     you can maintain your dignity and ignore the behaviour
b)     you can politely ask the person to adjust their behaviour (for example use headphones)
c)      you can leave the situation and move to another seat

You cannot eliminate the obnoxious behaviour of other people from your life so keep your distance and avoid allowing your stress levels to rise out of control.

Remember also that combating rude behaviour with rude behaviour just makes things worse – but if you choose to be kind that can make a difference.

As an example, if you receive a rude email from someone, respond by thanking the sender for the message and wishing them a great evening or weekend, whichever is more appropriate.

Taking this course of action put you into the position of authority rather than surrendering to the abuse.  I believe that the act of “killing them with kindness” can be extremely satisfying because the other person cannot in all honesty “fight back”.

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My 28 page 2019 Workbook containing lots of Personal Development tools is about to be retired and will soon be replaced by the (slightly) larger 2020 Workbook.



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The final copy of this book is
only available by placing a direct order with me    

The cost is £12 + shipping (payable via PayPal).

To order a copy please contact me.

Business Developer / Coach Emma Kersey said this about the 2018 Workbook

"Sorry I didn't get round to fully utilizing the e-book but please know that just reading it helped massively........... just needed a push and the book did that so thank you"


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About Dave   I am a coach; speaker; radio presenter and founder of The Blue Sky Company.  I am also a therapist and my therapy work includes music therapy; crystal therapy and Reiki.  Currently I am studying towards a Diploma in Mindfulness

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