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| Photo by Timon Studler on Unsplash |
It is a fact of life in
the 21st Century that everyone is becoming ruder. But that really should come as no surprise
because our parents, our grandparents even our great grandparents would have
said the same.
As children we are often taught
not to respond to a rude remark (or behaviour) with rudeness but on the other
hand, letting the person being rude towards us just feels so
wrong, and it often goes against everything we know.
wrong, and it often goes against everything we know.
Simply try to ignore it (I
know that is not so easy) – that person who is watching a video without
headphones in the seat beside you really should have some consideration but
they don’t so what can you do?
First of all consider this -
the person doing this may well have their reasons for behaving in this
way. If you follow this approach, even
though you don’t know what those reasons are, it might make their behaviour
seem rude.
However there are people who
are bad mannered and are simply “rule breakers”. You know the ones who push ahead of everyone
in a queue, they know it is the height of rudeness but they do it anyway. However, on the other side of that coin, they
might have been raised in a country where such behaviour is perfectly
acceptable.
Similarly, sniffing instead
of blowing one’s nose in public is, in certain countries, considered to be
politeness.
If someone were to “ignore”
you in the works tearoom would you assume that you were being avoided
deliberately? However, is it just
possible that the other person may think that they are respecting you
privacy? One approach you could follow
would be to invite them to come over and join you.
It was once observed that we
can make ourselves miserable by attempting to control things that we have no
control over and failing to control the things that we can.
If we look again at rudeness
you may have several choices
a) you can maintain your dignity and ignore the
behaviour
b) you can politely ask the person to adjust their
behaviour (for example use headphones)
c) you can leave the situation and move to another seat
You cannot eliminate the
obnoxious behaviour of other people from your life so keep your distance and
avoid allowing your stress levels to rise out of control.
Remember also that combating
rude behaviour with rude behaviour just makes things worse – but if you choose
to be kind that can make a difference.
As an example, if you
receive a rude email from someone, respond by thanking the sender for the
message and wishing them a great evening or weekend, whichever is more
appropriate.
Taking this course of action
put you into the position of authority rather than surrendering to the
abuse. I believe that the act of
“killing them with kindness” can be extremely satisfying because the other
person cannot in all honesty “fight back”.
oooOOOooo
My 28 page 2019 Workbook containing lots of Personal Development tools is about to be retired and will soon be replaced by the (slightly) larger 2020 Workbook.
oooOOOooo
The final copy of this book is
only available by placing a direct order with me
The cost is £12 + shipping (payable via PayPal).
To order a copy please contact me.
Business Developer / Coach Emma Kersey said this about the 2018 Workbook
"Sorry I didn't get round to fully utilizing the e-book but please know that just reading it helped massively........... just needed a push and the book did that so thank you"
ooo000ooo
About Dave I am a coach; speaker; radio presenter and founder of The Blue Sky Company. I am also a therapist and my therapy work includes music therapy; crystal therapy and Reiki. Currently I am studying towards a Diploma in Mindfulness
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