My
Slip
Was
Showing!
Hi and thank you for being here.
Before I begin, a little historical fact - in the "olden" days women used to wear a garment under their dresses called a "slip" . A slip was a full length garment designed to give a the dress a better shape. The term "my slip is showing" instead of being an actual statement of fact eventually came to mean someone was making a mistake.
So this week I thought I would tell you something about a personal experience that I have gone through within the last 24 hours.
The story goes as follows:-I came home from work yesterday evening to a happy atmosphere within the house. I was told when I got indoors that we were having a visitor in the evening. This is not an unusual occurrence and in fact I was really looking forward to it.
The reason being that since the situation with regards to the perceived* Coronavirus pandemic, we have led fairly sheltered lives. Therefore, seeing someone different would prove to be a welcome distraction.
At around 7 o’clock the doorbell rang and we welcomed our bubble-sharing friend**
As is usual with this person the conversation was quite spirited and all was going very well until a WhatsApp message arrived for my wife Alison.
It is often the case that when these messages arrive the content is discussed (not in full glorious technicolour but in sufficient detail to say what is happening). However, this time it was not!
Several more of these messages arrived during the evening and again, the content was not discussed.
But I did eventually gather (from a comment that was made quietly) that the conversation was about a Christmas dinner event for the social group Alison and our friend belonged to.
In and of itself this would not normally cause any sort of a problem! However, because I carry a little bit of angst concerning this group (which is a whole different story) I was somewhat perturbed that Alison had felt it necessary to be so secretive.
The fact that I knew nothing about the impending event, together with the apparent secrecy surrounding it, caused me something of an upset.
This resulted in my inner instincts coming into play and I chose to retreat into my shell rather than discuss the situation openly. However, this decision led to the evening's conversation becoming quite awkward and somewhat difficult.
Before any judgmental comments are passed I know that this type of action goes against everything that I teach clients, but it does go to prove that I am a normal human and and as such have failings and knee jerk reactions, just as everyone else.
However, because it was so unusual for the secrecy and guarded conversation to be manifest in our house I felt threatened and simply reacted from gut instinct.
The reason being that since the situation with regards to the perceived* Coronavirus pandemic, we have led fairly sheltered lives. Therefore, seeing someone different would prove to be a welcome distraction.
At around 7 o’clock the doorbell rang and we welcomed our bubble-sharing friend**
As is usual with this person the conversation was quite spirited and all was going very well until a WhatsApp message arrived for my wife Alison.
It is often the case that when these messages arrive the content is discussed (not in full glorious technicolour but in sufficient detail to say what is happening). However, this time it was not!
Several more of these messages arrived during the evening and again, the content was not discussed.
But I did eventually gather (from a comment that was made quietly) that the conversation was about a Christmas dinner event for the social group Alison and our friend belonged to.
In and of itself this would not normally cause any sort of a problem! However, because I carry a little bit of angst concerning this group (which is a whole different story) I was somewhat perturbed that Alison had felt it necessary to be so secretive.
The fact that I knew nothing about the impending event, together with the apparent secrecy surrounding it, caused me something of an upset.
This resulted in my inner instincts coming into play and I chose to retreat into my shell rather than discuss the situation openly. However, this decision led to the evening's conversation becoming quite awkward and somewhat difficult.
Before any judgmental comments are passed I know that this type of action goes against everything that I teach clients, but it does go to prove that I am a normal human and and as such have failings and knee jerk reactions, just as everyone else.
However, because it was so unusual for the secrecy and guarded conversation to be manifest in our house I felt threatened and simply reacted from gut instinct.
I have since apologised to Alison for my behaviour.
So where did I go wrong?
Quite simply, I reacted because I felt threatened!
I did not assess and evaluate the situation and then respond appropriately. I simply curled up into a ball (figuratively) and went into shut down mode!
* I have my own opinions about what is (and what is not) happening in the UK at present.
oooOOOooo
** for those who don’t know about bubbles. Here in the UK we are permitted (during the lockdown situations) to have certain visitors, provided that we are sharing our space to provide them with support and assistance (otherwise known as a bubble).
oooOOOooo
The 2021 Workbook is now in progress!
However if you wish to order a copy of the outgoing 2020 workbook please navigate to the Shopping Page
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"Sorry I didn't get round to fully utilizing the e-book but please know that just reading it helped massively........... just needed a push and the book did that so thank you"
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About Dave I am a personal development coach; a therapist; speaker; and radio presenter. A number of years ago I founded The Blue Sky Company to enable me to develop my work in more ways. In addition I am also a therapist and my therapy work includes music therapy; crystal therapy, Reiki and I am working towards a Diploma in Mindfulness.
If you would like to know more about my therapy work etc, then please email me.
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