Wednesday, 31 July 2019

Self Mastery Revisited


Hi it’s Dave,

Several years ago my friend Tom and I collaborated on a small book called “Solution Based Thinking” and recently we have been looking at the possibility of creating a small seminar tour based around this book.  During the discussion we considered that we could include a seminar session on the implications of

SELF MASTERY


Self Mastery (otherwise known as Self Discipline) is the ability to control your behaviour, to motivate yourself to do the things you should be doing and not do things you shouldn't.

Willpower may be considered a part of self mastery, but sometimes trying to "force" yourself to do something is extremely counter productive and simply makes things worse.

Experience has taught us that learning to associate negative feelings with an activity, makes it far more difficult to do, and therefore we become less likely to do it.

There are many possible routes into self discipline, I have added a few here but I am sure that if you think carefully you will be able to find even more.

Suppose you are delaying the completion of your tax return.

How do you feel about it?  Do you feel stressed when you think about sitting down and completing those forms? Then there is a simple answer - don't think about it!  It is a known fact that when sufficient thought is given to any project, more thought just creates more stress.

In this case the negative feelings that develop make it harder and harder to force yourself to do what needs to be done and eventually you feel that you have no self discipline!

The cure for this is taking ACTION!

Start by putting the forms where you can work on them later.

Later, gather all the materials and put them with the forms. The next day, do just one form, and then another.

Whatever the task is, you can find enough motivation for just one small step.

Train your mind to take that first step as soon as you think of it.

Then take the next step, and so on and pretty quickly you will discover that the whole project has been completed.  Having tried this way several times I have always found that the task becomes easier once I make a start and pretty soon the job is done and I wonder why I was getting so uptight about it

On a different point

If you have ever stopped up all night talking about something interesting, you know what power the mind has over the body.

It is very easy to put off sleep when we are motivated by a passionate discussion. It doesn't take much willpower to keep doing something when you are really involved and enjoying what you are doing. 

So here we discover a further key into the realm of self discipline.

When you enjoy what you are doing you are fired up and motivated.

Willpower goes up and down with energy levels, so play energetic music, move around, laugh, and look for ways to enjoy whatever project you are working on.

The more you associate good feelings with a task, the easier it is to discipline yourself to do it.

Cut a task up into a few steps, and then give yourself a reward every time you complete each step. This could be a (small) tub of ice cream, watching your favourite tv programme, or simply relaxing for a few minutes. Reward yourself with a virtual pat on the back as well.

When you recognize your successes, large and small, the possibilities become more real to you, and more likely to be repeated.

Suppose that piece of cake calls to you, or that television takes your attention away from your more important work.

It can be hard to resist temptation!

Stronger willpower is a nice theory, but there is a simpler solution:-

Stop standing in front of the cake!
Turn off the television!

This is an easy lesson to understand, but I suggest that to train yourself and to apply it habitually takes a little bit of perseverance and some help by the use of lateral thinking help!

Don't keep beer in the house if you don't want to drink it.

Don't go alone to single's bars if you want to maintain a faithful marriage.

Stay away from people and things that have the potential to lead you into trouble!

Self discipline doesn't mean you have to become immune to temptation, but it does mean that you must develop the willpower to say no, when and if you wish.

But if you are doing that, why not have the wisdom to avoid temptation?

If you learn where your resistance is low, then you can avoid those situations with relative ease.

Doesn't this make more sense than fighting useless battles with yourself?

Fighting with yourself is no way to develop self discipline. It is far better to learn about yourself; how are you energized; what motivates you and what are your strengths and weaknesses

When you recognise that these things that you learn about yourself are beginning to happen you can start using what you learn to make the behaviours you want to develop easier.

That is smarter self discipline

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So as we reach the end of this week’s post I would like to thank you sincerely for reading it and I hope that you will find the points useful as you move forwards in your daily life.

If you have enjoyed the post then please click on the follow link and sign up so that you never miss another post from me.  Also please leave a comment in the box if you have enjoyed what you have read or found it useful

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My 28 page 2019 Workbook containing lots of Personal Development tools is now on sale.  


The final copies of this book are strictly limited and they 
    are now only available by placing a direct order with me    

The cost is £12 + shipping (payable via PayPal).

To order a copy please contact me.

Business Developer / Coach Emma Kersey said this about the 2018 Workbook

"Sorry I didn't get round to fully utilizing the e-book but please know that just reading it helped massively........... just needed a push and the book did that so thank you"


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About Dave   I am a coach; speaker; radio presenter and founder of The Blue Sky Company.  

I am also a therapist and the owner of a virtual light centre called
 Rainbow Bridge.  My therapy work includes music therapy; crystal therapy and I am qualified as a Reiki Master / Teacher and currently studying a Colour Therapy course,

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Have a fantastic day, live a life of Passion and Power.

And above all

Don't Predict The Future - CREATE IT!

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