Wednesday 10 July 2019

THINGS TO DO WHEN YOU CAN'T FIND YOURSELF


Photo by Paul Siewert on Unsplash
Hi Welcome to the Under Blue Skies blog.  Let me begin this post by asking you a question – What does “finding yourself” actually mean?

To begin with to be able to find yourself you have to have some idea of what you are actually looking for.  What you are actually hoping to find!  You might be hoping to find a person who is prepared to take action towards achieving their goals and those ambitions are aligned with the goals. 

However, now I have to tell you something - that person is not out there!  The said person will not pop into your mind acting all enthusiastic and saying “here I am now let’s get living!”

Quite simply you have to create the person that you want to find because right here and now you have the power to do just that.  You can create yourself as whoever you want to be.  Coincidentally as I was writing this a colleague of mine wandered into the office and announced that he was heading off to Israel tomorrow for a holiday and to “find his roots” – how bizarre?

To be honest had he said he was off to find himself I would have made a comment about that and in that comment told him that you never “find” yourself.  Your life is about creating the person (or masterpiece that is you and you alone!)

So accept that your life is what ever you choose to make it. The fact that you can change it at any moment will always help you in creating the life that you desire.

Look at your habits

Do you have a desire to become a non – smoker?  Well, the simple answer is “Stop Smoking!”

Do you want to become a “morning person” Well, the simple answer is to get up early every day.

You have the ability to become whoever you want to be but you have to be prepared to change who you are currently so that you can become who you want to be. 

Now let me tell you that I am not saying it is easy to make these changes because sometimes it is not!  What I am saying is that it is simple to do!  You have to realise that the only person stopping you from becoming who you want to be is you yourself.

If the habits you have do not improve your life – you have to get rid of them!  Accept that you had these habits, give them thanks for accompanying you on this journey, accept that they probably made your life more enjoyable and then say goodbye to them.  You probably know that your life is going to improve in lots of different ways by leaving these old habits behind you.

It is a great idea to take up new habits that are going to assist you in living a better life.  You might find that travelling to work on the bus or train provides a time when you can listen to a self improvement podcast or an audio book.

Look at your Limiting Beliefs such as:-

I cannot join a gym because someone might laugh at me!

I cannot travel on my own because something might happen to me!

I will not start a blog because someone I know might read it

Now consider these statements

If I join that gym then I will see improvements in my confidence, I will gain strength and fitness.

Travelling on my own will give me the opportunity to listen to something that I like or to meet some great people and create new friendships,

If I do start to write my own blog I might be able to make it my full time job with all the benefits that can bring.

When we actually want to do something we are judged by ourselves – a little part of us decides that it is going to try to stop us – don’t think this part is the subconscious because it isn’t, it is actually the ego – the reason for this is because our ego does not want us to fail which is why it steps in………simply thank it for being worried and concerned and then ask yourself if it is worth it to proceed.

Other people may try to stop you!

There are a couple of points that are worth making here – firstly, surround yourself with people who make you feel good.  If there are people around you who are not on the “same page” as you are their actions although well intentioned with hold you back because they find it is convenient for them to have you in their lives.  So make yourself your number 1 priority.

Secondly you have total control over how you react in situations – if a naysayer pops into your space, listen to what they say, accept that this is their opinion and not yours, then move on with your journey.  Arguments and worrying about what these people thing will only weigh you down so don’t allow it to ruin your day.

And finally

It is perfectly possible to develop new habits; to unfollow the people whose posts on social media do not bring value into your life; to stop socialising with people who drain your energy; get rid of your limiting beliefs.

Just think for a moment you have probably been taught since childhood that putting yourself first is both egocentric and selfish but consider this – would it not be a waste of your life if you did not put yourself first.

Change the way you behave and then you can look back over your life and think about how great it has been, instead of thinking “what could I have done if only I had put myself first and pushed myself to do such and such a thing?” Or “what could I have had if I had done things this way or that way?”

Do NOT be a victim, leave your comfort zone, grab hold of your life and start living it to the full.

oooOOOooo



My 28 page 2019 Workbook containing lots of Personal Development tools is currently on sale.  


This book is only available direct from me
    

The cost is £12 + shipping (payable via PayPal).

To order a copy please contact me.


Business Developer / Coach Emma Kersey said this about the 2018 Workbook

"Sorry I didn't get round to fully utilizing the e-book but please know that just reading it helped massively........... just needed a push and the book did that so thank you"



ooo000ooo

About Dave   I am a coach; speaker; radio presenter and founder of The Blue Sky Company.  I am also a therapist and owner of a virtual light centre called Rainbow Bridge.  My therapy work includes music therapy; crystal therapy and I am qualified as a Reiki Master / Teacher and currently studying a Colour Therapy course,

If you would like to know more about the blog or my therapy work etc, then please email me.

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And above all

Don't Predict The Future - CREATE IT!


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