If you cannot recognize your feelings,
you will never be able to control them properly, and surprisingly enough, this
lack of recognition will affect your demeanour and this will almost certainly affect
your disposition—and your output—at work.
If
you were to ask Paul, who is a director of a high-end trade supply business,
whether his emotions had an impact on his work, he would most probably laugh at
the suggestion.
It
is very likely that he would say that what matters is the fact that he can turn
a client’s vision for production into a design that is both practical and
aesthetically pleasing. He would most
likely say that has feelings have little or nothing to do with anything like
that.
However,
if you were to ask Paul’s employees and co-workers you would most likely hear a
very different story. They would tell you that his work with the clients and the
relationship with his co-workers is very inconsistent.
If
he comes to work in a good mood everything goes well. But when he becomes angry
or frustrated, his interactions most definitely suffer.
He
does not listen well and often shows contempt for the client’s suggestions.
Often this leads to mistakes in design interpretation and because he did not
accurately incorporate their wishes in the first instance, things “on the job”
have to change. It has got to the point
where his fellow staff members do their best to avoid him when he is in a bad mood.
Paul’s
failure to identify his feelings and how they influence his behaviour and this
then affects his work performance. What Paul lacks is emotional self-awareness!
What is
Emotional Self-Awareness?
Emotional
self-awareness (ESA) is being able to recognize and understand your emotions
and how they affect your behaviour.
When
you are Emotionially Self Aware you know how you feel and why you feel that
way. And, you can see how your feelings can help or negatively affect what you
do. You have a much more accurate and tuned sense
of how other people see you.
Emotional
self-awareness focuses on your feeligs.
Paul
is far from a position of emotional self-awareness at present but it is something that he could develop over
a relatively short period of time.
Emotional
intelligence also includes skills in managing your emotions, awareness of
others, and managing relationships.
Why Does
Emotional Self-Awareness Matter?
Paul
is in a situation that shows that without being able to recognize his feelings,
he is unable to control them. The lack
of this awareness stands in the way of sensing the emotions of others people,
of empathy.
It
is hard to maintain a positive outlook
or influence others if you don’t know how you feel, a high level of skill with
Emotional Self-Awareness predicts your
overall success at work.
Recent
research indicates that around 92% of leaders who are skilled in Emotional
Self-Awareness have high energy and high performance teams, and leaders with
low self-awareness create negative
climates at work.
How You
Can Develop Emotional Self-Awareness
Recognizing
your feelings and their influence on how you act and behave is a skill that you
can develop just like you can build and improve your swimming or tennis
techniques.
Noticing
and paying attention to your feelings is not something that you do once and
then it stays with you forever. It is something that is developed over time, it
takes attention and practice, and then ongoing daily attention to maintain. In this respect it is just like mindfulness!
A
key tool for building self-awareness is tuning in to your body. Notice how your
heart behaves:-
When
you are either terrified or furious, your heart pounds at a much faster rate
than when you are calm. You may break out in a light sweat or breathe more
rapidly, or your shoulder muscles may tighten.
Paying
attention to these bodily reactions when they occur will allow you to take the
steps necessary to bring the situation back under control.
ooo000ooo
About Dave I am a coach; speaker; radio presenter and founder of The Blue Sky Company. I am
also a therapist and co-owner of a virtual light centre called The Crystal Spring. My therapy work includes music therapy; crystal therapy
and I recently qualified as a Reiki Master / Teacher and I am currently
studying a Colour Therapy course,
If you
would like to know more about the blog or my therapy work etc, then please email me via this link
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Have a fantastic day, live a life of Passion and Power.
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Don't Predict The Future - CREATE IT!
DAve x
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