Finding Your Voice!

     Finding Your Voice

Thank you for taking the time to join me here today.  

I decided that this week was probably a good time (in this period of unrest, discomfort and all of the other situations that are presenting themselves) to say something about Finding Your Voice.


I first wrote about this subject approximately a year ago when I was studying towards a Mindfulness Diploma and I decided that one day I would revisit and explore this subject a little further.

So as I said earlier I think that now is probably a good time to do this.  Listed below are a number of questions / tasks that will help you to decide what makes you the unique person that you are.

The first step to finding your voice is to examine your character closely - with honesty being the most important rule governing your answers.  

Make a list of all the words that describe your character and the qualities you possess.  Take your time doing this and be as accurate as possible with the words that you use.  

When you have created your list go back over it and find the 3 words that most accurately describe the best qualities you possess.

In my particular case the words I came up with at the end of this were

a) tenacious                              b) considerate                              c) deep

Next ask yourself (and answer truthfully) is this how I talk and come across to others?  If they were asked would people agree that the words I have used accurately portray my personal characteristics?

ooooooooo

Now let us look at the people that you have chosen to be part of your circle. 

Do you share common interests?

Are they male or female?

Are they in business on their own account or hold senior management positions?

Are they keen to develop themselves?

Do they share a similar sense of humour?

Do they share your values concerning right and wrong, good and bad etc?

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Next we need to establish the cultural / artistic influences you lean toward.  

Write down all the items of the above -

These answers will help you to determine (if you have not already worked it out) which situations would be comfortable (for you) should you be called upon to experience and discuss.

For example if you are a devoted fan of the music of The Beatles / The Rolling Stones or similar - you may find that you are uncomfortable attending the ballet or the opera

What sort of books appeal to you?  Biography, Science Fiction, Romance or others 

That then is the easy part...............

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Next you need to ask the question that is probably the most difficult and awkward question of them all.  

What do other people think of you and do their answers agree with how you see yourself?

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And finally................

Take a few moments and just write......this may not be as hard as you first think!    You can use this time to get things off your chest, write about things that are bothering you; things you like;  things you want more of in your life; things you want less of in your life;

This is your time, nobody is going to judge you and so you can let your mind go wild, you can truly "Find Your Voice!"

oooOOOooo

The (slightly) larger 2020 Workbook is now available!

To order a copy of the workbook please navigate to the Shopping Page

Business Developer / Coach Emma Kersey said this about the 2018 Workbook

"Sorry I didn't get round to fully utilizing the e-book but please know that just reading it helped massively........... just needed a push and the book did that so thank you"

ooo000ooo

About Dave   I am a personal development coach; a therapist; speaker; and  radio presenter.  A number of years ago I founded The Blue Sky Company to enable me to develop my work in more ways.  In addition I am also a therapist and my therapy work includes music therapy; crystal therapy, Reiki and I am working towards a Diploma in Mindfulness.

If you would like to know more about my therapy work etc, then please email me.

If you would like to join our Facebook group just follow the link below to the Under Blue Skies page. The page is home to a group of like - minded people (affectionately knows as "the tribe").

By way of a thank you for their continued support Tribe Members regularly receive exclusive content that I do not post anywhere else.  The page also provides advanced information about forthcoming projects and events.

So please spread the word about the blog, the tribe etc. to your friends and family and I hope to see you as a member of our "Tribe" soon.

Under Blue Skies Private group · 27 members Join Group This group aims to concentrate primarily on Personal Change although at times there may be elements of Business Change or a cross over point somewhere...

LINKS

Website:

www.moonshadowmedia.wixsite.com/bluesky

Wytchwynd Photography

http://moonshadowmedia.wixsite.com/photographyportfolio

Pinterest:

https://www.pinterest.co.uk/davethemerlin/under-blue-skies/

To subscribe to the blog please go over to the right hand side of this page and click the button that says “Follow”.  Once you do that you will be added to our list of subscribers.

Feel free to share this and other posts with your friends and associates

Inspirational Phrases

In addition to the above I send out a daily email containing an Inspirational Phrase. 

To ensure that we comply with the relevant regulations this is a subscription only service and to  be included please send an email using “add me” as the subject to:- 

underblueskies@zoho.com

Once you have subscribed the phrases will be delivered to your mail box every day at no cost to you whatsoever.

Have a fantastic day, live a life of Passion and Power.

And above all

Don't Predict The Future - CREATE IT!

A "should" and "ought" person!!

Hi everyone

A "Should" and "Ought"                   Person

I have been doing a great deal of soul-searching recently and one of the things that I have been wrestling with is my business name.  When I started coaching a few years ago I called the business

Altered Image (Life Coaching) 

and in all fairness it was a good choice that alluded to what I was about. I built my client list and soon enjoyed plenty of repeat business

However, I ignored my own evidence, changed the business name to The Blue Sky Company and did a big re-brand.  I also branded this blog etc. as Under Blue Skies.  My thinking was that the coaching services would be provided using The Blue Sky Company name and the blog and daily output would carry the Under Blue Skies brand.

Recently, I have been wondering whether the name change did me more harm than good because the coaching work has steadily decreased to just a handful of clients and whilst I am still offering a range of services, the phone is not ringing.  Under Blue Skies provides a lot of "free" content (which to be honest takes a lot of curating), which in turn takes a lot of time.  I have also wondered if the current economic climate is contributing to the situation.

So recently I have taken a long hard look at myself and quite honestly what I saw upset me. I have been displaying a similar trait to that of people I have coached in the past - I have begun to use what I call "advisory words" such as "I should do some research for the next post" or "I ought to read a new book"

Now I know as fact that in most cases the "shoulds" and the "oughts" will NEVER get done because there is no compulsion behind them.  Thus I have taken a leaf from my own book and those words are to be banned because I know that to allow me to move forwards the "shoulds" and "oughts" have to be replaced by "MUSTS"

Once someone has a "must do" in their life they have set the scene for progress and movement. I must be honest and say that I have spent many hours coaching people around Goals and Goal Setting because I believe in the "practice what you preach" maxim.  I have, in the past, followed the paths to my own goals in small manageable steps but I was still guilty of using the shoulds and oughts sometimes.

Sadly I had discovered that it was much easier to "should all over the place" than it was to grab things and do them by making the "musts".

So I had let things slide.............. 

I took my eye off the ball and started to follow the easy option.  I created what was predominantly free content - it meant that I didn't have to think too hard.  I could simply trot out a couple of daily posts on one or two topics and then believe that it was a case of "job done" - and thus my coaching need had been supplied.

However, I must add a cautionary note here - be very careful how and when you use the word "must" especially if you are talking to other people because it can be a stepping stone towards disaster.  

Example - if you are talking to someone and use the words "you must..." I would go as far as to say that you are 90% guaranteed to annoy the other person.  More than likely they will become hostile and angry towards you.  It is far better to use the words "if it were me I would......." which I refer to as the method of "Me I" communication.

So my advice is as follows:- Don't be fooled by "shoulds" and "oughts" they will make you feel happy because they are the keys to procrastination and to being ineffective!

If progress is your goal then it has to be a "MUST"

Oh and the business name decision?   Altered Image Coaching.


As a result of the above the coming weeks will see the coaching reverting to the Altered Image branding and there will be some quite major reworking on my internet presence.


                                                              oooOOOooo

The (slightly) larger 2020 Workbook is now available!

To order a copy of the workbook please navigate to the Shopping Page

Business Developer / Coach Emma Kersey said this about the 2018 Workbook

"Sorry I didn't get round to fully utilizing the e-book but please know that just reading it helped massively........... just needed a push and the book did that so thank you"

ooo000ooo

About Dave   I am a personal development coach; a therapist; speaker; and  radio presenter.  A number of years ago I founded The Blue Sky Company to enable me to develop my work in more ways.  In addition I am also a therapist and my therapy work includes music therapy; crystal therapy; Reiki and Mindfulness (I am working towards a Diploma in Mindfulness).

So If you would like to know more about my therapy work etc, then please email me.

If you would like to join our Facebook group just follow the link below to the Under Blue Skies page. The page is home to a group of like - minded people (affectionately knows as "the tribe").

By way of a thank you for their continued support Tribe Members regularly receive exclusive content that I do not post anywhere else.  The page also provides advanced information about forthcoming projects and events.

So please spread the word about the blog, the tribe etc. to your friends and family and I hope to see you as a member of our "Tribe" soon.

Under Blue Skies Private group · 27 members Join Group This group aims to concentrate primarily on Personal Change although at times there may be elements of Business Change or a cross over point somewhere...

LINKS

Website:

www.moonshadowmedia.wixsite.com/bluesky

Wytchwynd Photography

http://moonshadowmedia.wixsite.com/photographyportfolio

Pinterest:

https://www.pinterest.co.uk/davethemerlin/under-blue-skies/

To subscribe to the blog please go over to the right hand side of this page and click the button that says “Follow”.  Once you do that you will be added to our list of subscribers.

Feel free to share this and other posts with your friends and associates

Inspirational Phrases

In addition to the above I send out a daily email containing an Inspirational Phrase. 

To ensure that we comply with the relevant regulations this is a subscription only service and to  be included please send an email using “add me” as the subject to:- 

underblueskies@zoho.com

Once you have subscribed the phrases will be delivered to your mail box every day at no cost to you whatsoever.

Have a fantastic day, live a life of Passion and Power.

And above all

Don't Predict The Future - CREATE IT!

The Oak Seed Project - This month's topic is "Putting Yourself First"

Following last month's request for Project Ambassadors 

I thought I would begin 

as I mean to go on and invite readers 

to comment on the following topic 

PUTTING

         YOURSELF 

                       FIRST!    

If, like I did a number of years ago, you work in a job where you work long hours and where there can at times, be incredible pressures on you to get certain projects delivered within specific parameters such as client satisfaction, time constraints, budgetary limitations.

The more I worked the less happy I was with my job, I felt that I was swimming in treacle and that the rewards never matched the effort that I was putting in.  I was heading towards depression and my wife had noticed and finally said something to me about her concerns.

However I poo-pooed her comments at first, but as time went by I became more and more wrapped up in what I was doing and spent more time at the office than I ever did with her. 

Eventually something hit me like bullet 

 I HAD TO ESCAPE!!!

And so I quite literally ran for the hills!  While she was at work I wrote a short note telling her that I loved her, I packed a few things in a bag, picked up my guitar and drove off into the sunset looking for purple spaceships.

Those 2 nights were the worst nights of my life, I cried and drank, I cried again, I drank some more and eventually headed into a tear and alcohol fueled oblivion.

When I finally made my way home, I was very unsure of what the reception would be, but I knew that I had to face it if my marriage was to stand any chance of survival.

Hours and hours of talking followed and eventually the decision was reached that I would tender my resignation on the grounds that I was no longer able to cope with the stresses of that work environment.

And so that, as they say, was then and after a long crawl back to a better and happier life this is now! 

I am older, maybe wiser (at least I hope I am) and much more together.  I am working as a coach / therapist, I have written and published several books and more besides.  All of this has come about because I took the decision (alongside and encouraged by my wife) to put myself first.

oooOOOooo

So now over to you - please comment below with your own stories so that we can start building the monthly discussions that The Oak Seed Project is going to be all about.

Here is the first of the "on topic" videos etc. for discussion during the month.

Have a fantastic month.

DAve x

PS - we are still on the lookout for Project Ambassadors, so if you would like to know a little more please read our earlier post and if the idea appeals to you

Please Contact Me

The Oak Seed Project needs Project Ambassadors

I am looking for some very special individuals to join with me (as volunteer Project Ambassadors) here at The Blue Sky Company.  I feel that these people will need to work closely with me so that together we can develop this new project as part of the brand umbrella.  Currently the title of this project is

“The Oak Seed Project”

A way of overcoming a lack of confidence

Photo by Casey Horner on Unsplash

In this post I want to talk a little about stage fright (or fear) and provide you with a explanation about why we feel like that and hopefully help your realise that you can bring yourself into a more confident state.

Video Wish for 24/02/19 - "He Who Composes....."

Today's Video Wish

ooo000ooo

My 28 page 2019 Workbook containing lots of Personal Development tools is now on sale.  

Currently it is only directly available from myself    

The cost is £12 + shipping (payable via PayPal).

To order a copy please contact me.

Business Developer / Coach Emma Kersey said this about the 2018 Workbook

"Sorry I didn't get round to fully utilizing the e-book but please know that just reading it helped massively........... just needed a push and the book did that so thank you"

ooo000ooo

About Dave   I am a coach; speaker; radio presenter and founder of The Blue Sky Company.  I am also a therapist and owner of a virtual light centre called Rainbow Bridge.  My therapy work includes music therapy; crystal therapy and I am qualified as a Reiki Master / Teacher and currently studying a Colour Therapy course,

If you would like to know more about the blog or my therapy work etc, then please email me.

Follow the link to join our Facebook page Under Blue Skies this page is host to a group of like - minded people (affectionately knows as "the tribe").

It would also be fantastic if you would spread the word about the blog, the tribe etc. to your friends and family.

LINKS

Website:

www.moonshadowmedia.wixsite.com/bluesky

Wytchwynd Photography

http://moonshadowmedia.wixsite.com/photographyportfolio

Pinterest:

https://www.pinterest.co.uk/davethemerlin/under-blue-skies/

To subscribe to the blog please go over to the right hand side of this page and click the button that says “Follow”.  Once you do that you will be added to our list of subscribers.

Feel free to share this and other posts with your friends and associates

Inspirational Phrases

We send out a daily email containing an Inspirational Phrase. 

However, to ensure that we comply with the relevant regulations this is a subscription only service. 

To be included please send an email using “add me” as the subject to  

underblueskies@zoho.com

When you have subscribed the phrases will be delivered to your mail box every day at no cost to you whatsoever.

It would also be great if you would spread the word about the blog, the tribe etc. to your friends and family

Have a fantastic day, live a life of Passion and Power.

And above all

Don't Predict The Future - CREATE IT!

DAve x

Mindful Parenting - A Special Guest Post

This week’s post is a special guest post by my friend and fellow Midlander Catherine Green

Celebrating Success

Hi and Good Morning from Ilfracombe.  You join me on a day where I am celebrating a massive client breakthrough.

Behind The Vision Board

©2017 My 2018 Vision Board

Let us take a look at the way to create a vision board that actually works.  The secret behind every good vision board is that it helps push you forwards in life and works towards turning what once seemed impossible into something that is very, very possible.

Some Bits From My Filing Cabinet

(Photo: ©2018 wytchwynd photography)

Hi I can tell it is getting towards the end of the year because all around me people are clearing out drawers, files, in-trays etc. 

Some Tips on Self Appreciation

Photo by A L L E F . V I N I C I U S Δ on Unsplash

Hi and welcome to the first blog of the "Festive Season".  It is time when you show appreciation and good will to all me, so why not to yourself?